Saturday, February 21, 2009

One fever, two fever

I've recently gone back to reading some of the women in science-related blogs that I was following over a year ago. I'm impressed they've managed to maintain their blogging. I guess the year I was in treatment I just didn't want to think so much about my life as a Mom and scientist - just wanted to think about getting through treatment. But now that I'm back working and looking at a less flexible, potentially more stressful job, I'm thinking a lot about the stresses of being a mother to a 7 and 5 year old, being older than a lot of Mom's with kids my age, having a husband in an academic science career, thinking of changing my career yet again and being a cancer survivor (and the internal dialog that comes with that). My current job has a lot of flexibility. I can be out in front of the customers as much or as little as I want. That said, if I don't get out there, it will be a lot leaner year and I most likely won't make the company-mandated quotas. However, I can do a lot by email and phone when I need to. Like this last month.

You see SciDad's travels and job responsibilities leave him home only 10 days in February. I officially declared in Single Parenting Month! To top that off, my children have been home sick a total of 12 days since the last week of January, some days together. High fevers, flu-like symptoms (although tests showed it wasn't the flu), coughing, etc. I also got sick in the middle of it all but still kept up the Clara Barton role, spending one of my sickest nights cooling my daughter down from a 105 degree fever. Several days I had to call a mother of a child in my son's 1st grade to ask if they could bring him to school because I didn't want to bundle up my 5 year old daughter who was running a 103 degree fever and take her out of the house. She's been home with me for the last 4 days again with another bought of high fever and a throat infection (not strep).
I was reading MommyScientist's blog about her childcare issues and I can really relate, although her situation is more dire right now that mine. But if I get this new position, it's going to be a transition back to a more conventional work schedule and what will I do when the kids are sick for 4 days at a time? This is when I really hate being thousands of miles away from any family. I worry about feeding my kids a decent diet (some days I can multi-task working at home and cooking so that a nice dinner is on the table). I worry about their days at school going from 8 - 3pm and then afterschool until 5pm. When do they get to just be home and play? Should I give up this opportunity to keep the current flexibility since my children are young?
My head is full of these kinds of thoughts. How do you get your head around a job (new or current) and focus on that with all the other stuff that's on your mind? Maybe I'll find some answers on the other Mommy/Scientist blogs.

1 comment:

The bean-mom said...

SciMom,

I just recently saw your comment on my website. I'm THRILLED to see that you're back to blogging! Yours was actually one of the first women-in-science blogs I ever stumbled upon. I read you when you were "Doubleloop" and always wondered how your transition to industry went. Needless to say, I've been surprised to read of the many transitions and challenges that you've undergone since I last visited this site. It seems that you've gotten through it all with stength and grace. I'm wishing you all the best in this latest round of transition...

By the way, SciMom, do you know of the blog Toddler Planet http://toddlerplanet.wordpress.com/ ? Susan aka "whymommy" there blogs about her own journey as a mother, scientist, and breast cancer survivor. It seems that you and she have much in common...

I'm very much looking forward to reading more of your posts in this new year. As for your question at the end of this post... Ah, even though my position is hardly as challenging as a regular faculty position, I still struggle at times with the whole 9-5 work and then after-work routine. There's a blog post for the future, of course...

And I'll get to those interview questions for you soon. Looking forward to that, too =)